I’m without internet connection for a little while, so I’ve temporarily disabled the comment moderation. Feel free to comment away, and be sure to check back later, because I’ll be responding to you all when I return to the realm of internet.
This is my first official snippets post, and what better story to give you a peek into than my current WIP! Yep, that’s the Five Magic Spindles entry . . . which still doesn’t have a title. Botheration. Anyway, enough rambling. Behold the raw magic of a first draft. (Or perhaps, the raw mess. Take your pick; there’s a bit of both in there.)
Shutting the book, Luci leaned her head against the wall. “If loves puts you in a cage, I’d rather they didn’t love me.”
~*~
Reverie prattled on through the second and third courses, by which time the conversation had veered from dwarves and boots to rumblings from the ogre colonies, to the torrential rains sweeping across her homeland, to the princess’s lacy wrappings spun by Iror’s best spinners, to the quality of the rubies in the cutlery.
Aleida nodded along and inserted an “Oh my” or “Indeed” when appropriate.
~*~
Riar’s face tightened. “Forgive me. I am not in the habit of inviting dead people to parties.”
~*~
Luci eyed her company. “Master Boris.”
Her tutor raised his head. “Yes, Princess?”
“Have I ever told you that you have the nose of a pig?”
Boris blinked and touched his rounded, upturned nose. “I–no, Princess, you haven’t.”
“I think it goes lovely with your squinty little eyes.” Luci sliced off another bite of melon. “You would make a convincing swine in next year’s children’s pageant.”
~*~
“How fares your training?” Father asked, chipper tone belying his wasting frame.
”Better than ever.” Hadrian massaged his sore bicep.
Father sighed contentedly and shifted against the pillows. “Good. A king should know how to wield his sword.”
Hadrian looked down at the tiled floor. The onset of the withering six months ago had served to bring out Father’s greatest wisdom, however slight it may be, and in the past weeks he had talked of little more than kingship, death, and the crowning of his only son.
~*~
Without a backward glance, she ran up to her chambers and slammed the door. If her tongue could not speak her mind, that echoing boom certainly could.
~*~
Two things happened at once. The royal couple’s faces paled to the color of frost, and Aleida staggered back with a sudden wave of realization, crashing like the Falls when they were swollen with snowmelt.
~*~
“Who are you?”
“My name matters little.” She still did not face him, but stood rigid, arms crossed.
“It does if it belongs to the one who rescued me.”
~*~
Kronna turned on him, prematurely-grey braid swinging. A small beam of daylight fell on one side of her face and painted it paler than usual, while shadows cloaked the other side–a grotesque contrast on her harsh features. “Where are you going?”
Hadrian met her gaze unflinchingly. “The gardens.”
With an impatient wave of her hand, she turned to Father. “Go. If Bauglind were a plot of dirt, you would make a very prepared heir indeed.”
~*~
Floating. Falling–ever downward, never stopping. Nothingness full of something. Silence full of sound.
~*~
“Hold your thundercloud, I’m coming!” a voice shouted from within. Moments later, the door banged inward. “Oh! Prince Hadrian!” Reverie blinked. Her faded golden curls formed a tangled halo, mussed from sleep. “Good mor–is it morning?” She peered outside at the sky. “Hardly close enough to even wish you a good one. Hmph.”
~*~
In the waking world, during the hour before the sun rose, the sky would always begin to brighten in preparation, lightening in subtle shades. And slowly, the darkness would lift, and the shapes in Luci’s chambers would grow more distinct. That was how it felt now, as bits of knowledge floated back to her mind.
~*~
Reverie . . . launched into a story drawn from history, just wild enough to waver on the brink of belief, and just strange enough to make sense.
~*~
“There is a magic deeper than the curse, and deeper than my blessing.” [Aleida] spoke softly, but her words echoed against the mist. “We fairies cannot touch it. It lies within the very marrow of the earth’s bones, and it is beyond our comprehension to control.”
~*~
Luci whispered the words burning in her throat. “I have called them to their deaths.”
~*~
He came up behind her. “If I close my eyes, will you face me and hold out your hand?”
“Promise to keep your eyes shut?”
“Promise.” He closed them. “Now hold out your hand.”
Grass rustled. He reached out blindly and found her hand, warm and smooth as silk-leaf. Carefully, he wrapped her fingers around the star. “There. Something unasked.”
July has been a string of hot, humid days punctuated by rainstorms. Stepping outside was like hitting a wall of muggy air most afternoons–the temperature has hovered around 30 degrees Celsius (that’s close to 90 Fahrenheit, for all you Americans).
Pea season and strawberry season have come and gone. Fresh sugarsnaps just taste of summer, and a slice of pie stuffed with just-picked strawberries confirms that yes indeed, we are in the midst of summertime. And we can’t forget those few meals that were strictly composed of watermelon and rohl kuchen. (That’s a Mennonite/German dish . . . a deep-fried doughnut-y thing that looks like braided/twisted bread. It’s absolutely delicious with watermelon.)
You’d think these hot days would ooze by slowly, but noooo. July galloped by nearly as fast as May and June. I won’t inundate you with all the details, seeing as much of what filled my month was the same as last time (and the time before that): work, family time, gardening, general life activities, etc.
However, a few new things did happen this month.
My family and I celebrated Canada Day with friends. Snacks, fireworks, more glow sticks than I knew what to do with, and all-around fun times.
I wrote like crazy for my Sleeping Beauty novella–have I mentioned how desperately that thing is trying to grow into a novel??–and am currently at 17k. I hope to reach 20k in the next day or two, if I push hard. Not like that will signify the end of the story . . . The prince is just now on the cusp of going off to rescue the princess. Sound like a problem? It is. Even so, I’ve been having a delightful time unspooling this story, untangling threads and plaiting them into a design that will need some tweaking later not. Plus, Luci and Hadrian and Aleida and all the rest have completely captured my heart.
Recently, one of my dearest friends spent two and a half days at my place, during which time we enjoyed catching up, goofing off, watching both Captain America movies (her first time seeing them!), and bike riding out to a park to do a fun photo-shoot in the heavy July heat. Yes, we made sure to guzzle lots of water.
My two sisters took care of a friend’s little dog for a week, so we saw lots of that adorable pooch here during that time. (Do you know how hard it is to put her in her kennel for night and have to leave her whimpering there? Do you? She’s like a bratty child at bedtime, but how can you say no to that sad little whimper? My sisters had to drag me away.)
It was quiet on the reading front this month–only two novels. Now I know all you bookworms are gasping in horror right now, but in my defense, I was busy and one of the books was Pride and Prejudice.
This is my exact copy, picked up in perfect
condition at a book fair. For $3, that’s a win,
wouldn’t you say?
It took me almost three weeks to read, and every chapter felt like an accomplishment. Not that it was a bad book–not at all! I thoroughly enjoyed it. It’s just not the style I normally read, what with long sentences and heavy narration. But the cast of characters is a delight. Spunky Lizzie, kindhearted Jane, enigmatic Mr. Darcy (oh, my dear Mr. Darcy), indolent Mr. Bennet, frantically flighty Mrs. Bennet, adorable Mr. Bingley . . . Plus, the book is surprisingly witty. Can’t go wrong with formal, wordy insults.
The second book is Plain Kate by Erin Bow.
On a whim, I picked it up at the library because the cover was pretty and the blurb interesting. The simple narrative style is deceiving, though. I was expecting the story to sit comfortably on the younger YA level, but the darker themes and sparsely poetic prose nudge it up a bit. Seriously, Ms. Bow knows how to paint a stunning picture. I’m in love with her style. And with Kate herself, an orphaned carpenter thought by the townsfolk to be a witch. Simultaneously gutsy and fearful, this plain-featured girl possesses remarkable skill with a knife. Her cat, Taggle, winds up talking (don’t worry, that’s not a spoiler), and very quickly chose a spot in my heart as well. He’s just . . . very catty. If you’ve met Eanrin from Tales of Goldstone Wood, you’ll understand what I mean; yet Taggle is still his own unique self. Just hear him speak:
“Hello,” he said, then rolled over and peered up at her appealingly. “I am fond of you and present my throat for scratching.”
Besides, he offers to kill things to make Kate feel better. HE IS SUCH A CAT. Anyway, I’m nearly finished. This last quarter is raising all sorts of questions about the “villain.” Such as, should I remove the quotations and consider him an actual villain, or is he merely a sympathetic antagonist?
Well, that about sums up July. Not as much to detail here this time around, which is why I went on and on about books. But that’s a topic we all love, right? (And if you don’t, I must question why you read blogs in the first place, especially the blog of a writer. Stick around and I’ll convert you.)
How was your July? Do you have plans for August? I’ve got a few, one of them being to actually finish Sleeping Beauty’s first draft, title it, and start editing it (a.k.a. chopping it into pieces with my Big Editing Axe). Do tell! I’m interested to hear how your summer’s going. And since we were talking about food–quick, what’s your favorite summer dish?
When I look over the vast sea of fiction, I find language polluting the waters. Over and over again, it fouls what otherwise might have been a great book. And every clean secular novel I discover is cause for celebration, because they’re so very rare. I don’t know about you, but if there was a machine that could erase every obscenity out of books, I’d press that Big Red Button so fast, nobody would know what hit them.
Whether you’re nodding along right now, or quirking your brow and thinking, ‘Come on, Tracey, stop being a prude,’ I hereby present my case—five reasons language should be scooped out of the fiction ocean like so much overgrown seaweed.
1. It can be a sign of unintelligence. One doesn’t require much of an IQ to string together a bunch of obscenities. In fact, it shows a much higher level of intelligence to be able to express anger, frustration, surprise, pleasure, etc. with a clean vocabulary. And I’m sorry, but the moment you start cussing, you’ve just slapped a label across your own forehead. You make it harder for me—or anyone—to respect you. This goes for real life, and it goes for books. Every time a character cusses, my respect for that character and for its author begins to drop.
2. It’s uncreative, and it’s lazy. (Closely tied to the above reason.) It doesn’t take much creativity to let loose a blue streak. “I can’t believe that bleeping bleepity-bleep!” takes way less effort than, “I can’t believe that backstabbing cad! Has he no sense of decency?” Not that one has to be quite so wordy or cheesy about it . . .
3. It’s not that gritty. Meaning, it takes a lot more than an arsenal of swear words to achieve a sense of gritty realism, if that’s what the author is going for. A strong sense of setting, mood, and character goes a lot further than dialogue full of bleeps.
4. Readership. Segment A of the population doesn’t bat an eye at R-rated language. Segment B is generally repelled by it. So wouldn’t it make sense to tone down (or eliminate!) the element that’s chasing some of your readers away? Couldn’t you appeal to a wider audience by mopping up your verbiage? I have a boundary when it comes to the swearing in books: cross that line, either in volume or severity, and I shut the book and leave it on the shelf. Most likely never to pick it up again. Mr./Mrs. Author, you just lost yourself a few dollars.
5. In fantasy, it’s often unrealistic. This one applies mainly to the fantasy genre. I was watching the movie Seventh Son with my dad the other night. It’s high fantasy, okay, with dragons and monsters and a (ahem) typical beast-slaying plot. So when the characters started cussing using modern Earth words, that threw me for a loop! And this isn’t the only movie or book I’ve encountered that’s guilty of this believability-weakening flaw.
But there is a kind of language that I relish in a good fantasy tale–fictional profanity. Disclaimer: please don’t give me cuss words that rhyme with the real ones. I skimmed through the first quarter of a book about little people living in a tree, and characters were dropping thinly disguised swears left, right, and center. Sure, a handful of them had to do with twigs, leaves, and other tree-related things, but the majority of the profanity was so close to the real thing, my brain translated it instantly. This is how NOT to write fictional oaths.
One of my favorite examples of well done fantasy swearing is found in the Tales of Goldstone Wood series by Anne Elisabeth Stengl. Dragons are highly feared and despised in her world, so naturally, they feature in the language. “Dragon’s teeth,” or “Dragon’s eat you, ___!” appear often. So do references to powerful beings: “Lumè love me,” “lights above,” and “Iubdan’s beard,” just to name a few. This sort of language is just so fun to exclaim. The polite characters frown upon such usage, but we as readers don’t. It accomplishes the purpose without even coming near real world equivalents.
So what are your opinions on bookish profanity? Does it bother you? Does it matter? Whether you’re still nodding along at this point, or don’t agree with me in the slightest, I’m interested to hear your thoughts!
I’m super excited to use this month’s Beautiful People to introduce a character from my Sleeping Beauty novella! Hosted by the ever-creative Cait and Skye, these questions are particularly summery, and a number of them relate quite well to my main character:
Combine this face…
Princess Alucinora
(Known by her closest friends as Luci)
Luci
lowered her gaze and plucked the strings a little faster. “I would very much
like to go dragon riding with Aleida. Her dragons are well-trained—you’ve seen
how gently they draw her carriage.”
Father
cleared his throat, the sound like loose rocks tumbling down a mountain. “That
is not a particularly . . . er, ladylike activity.”
Luci
picked the next note harder. Simply because it requires one to wear
trousers? Aleida wears breeches all the time.
“Nor
is it safe,” Mother put in. “What would Iror do if the crown princess plummeted
to her death on the rocks?”
With this hair (though not quite as red),
and you get Luci.
Oh, and because some of the questions are worded for more modern stories, I’ll be tweaking a few along the way to fit my classic fairy-tale setting.
So without further ado, curious questers, let us begin.
1. What’s their favourite ice cream flavour?
There’s no ice cream in Luci’s kingdom, Iror, so we’ll change the question to favorite dessert. She loves fresh fruit, and there’s nothing better than cubed Glair melon and valley berries sprinkled with sugar.
2. Your character is getting ready for a night out. Where are they going? What are they wearing? Who will they be with?
Well, *cough* Luci doesn’t really . . . go out much. Or at all. Her parents are overprotective that way. A night in, however, is not out of the question, and often consists of performing for the nobles. As an infant, Luci received some very special gifts, you see, from eight fairy stewards. Among those magical talents are song, dance, and a way with musical instruments. Thus, she is a popular entertainment choice. So she’ll be in the castle’s Great Hall, she’ll be wearing one of her finer (though still poorly-woven) dresses, and she’ll be with her parents and the nobles.
3. Look at your character’s feet. Describe what you see there. Do they wear dress shoes, gym shoes, or none at all? Are they in socks that are ratty and full of holes? What do they consider comfortable and what do they consider agony?
Slippers of the royal sort, though likely scuffed from Luci’s wanderings about the castle or the occasional forest stroll. (When accompanied by guards, of course.) If she’s not wearing slippers, she’ll be barefoot–the most comfortable choice during the summer. What does she consider agony? Well, there is that one beaded pair that pinches and chafes in all the wrong places . . .
4. Do they have any birthmark or scars? Where are they and how did they get them?
Baby Luci–isn’t she adorable?
Another of Luci’s gifts is beauty, so if she was born with any birthmarks, they didn’t stick around. As for scars, not much dangerous or strenuous activity is allowed, so the worst she can boast is paper cuts from all the books she handles. She desperately wishes her appearance wasn’t so perfect, though. It’s rather tiring to have the castle staff gaze at you in awe every time you walk by.
(I have to insert a little aside here. Luci’s best friend Aleida, who happens to be the fairy steward of Iror, has a most intriguing scar . . . a star-shaped one on the back of her neck. She got it at a young age, during magic practice with an older fairy steward.)
5. What kind of music do they listen to? Does it change depending on their mood or is it always consistent? (Feel free to share samples!)
Luci avoids music as much as she can. She has little interest in something she can do perfectly. Her thoughts on being asked to perform?
“Like
asking someone to sit and just breathe for an audience. Ridiculous and dull.”
If she’s honest, though, she doesn’t mind music in general. The beauty of it has been tainted by her gifts and the attention they bring, but if she can get away from all that, there is something about airy woodwinds that stirs her desire for freedom.
6. Do they have any musical talent? Play an instrument? How’s their singing voice?
I believe we’ve covered that one quite well already.
7. What kind of book would you catch them reading?
Anything and everything, particularly adventure stories or fantastic legends. They’re the closest thing she has to an adventure of her own.
8. How would they spend their summers (or their holidays)?
Outdoors as much as possible! The forest is a favorite, and she loves visiting the waterfall with Aleida. But Luci dreams of an even better summer pastime: dragon riding. Unfortunately, the king and queen aren’t particularly keen on that idea.
9. It’s Saturday at noon. What is your character doing? Give details. Ex. If they’re eating breakfast, what’s on the menu? Are they hiking, shopping, lazing around?
Spending time with Aleida. They’ll either be talking, dreaming, walking, or holing up in the library together.
10. Is there anything your character wants to be free of?
All her days, Princess Luci has lived in the cage her parents made. They love her dearly, and since her safety has been compromised since birth, they’ll do all they can to ensure she is protected. Luci feels stifled, both by their caution and by her gifts. Beauty and music are the pedestal upon which others have set her, and her gift of diplomacy prevents her from voicing her deepest thoughts. With everything in her, she longs to be free. Free to speak her mind, free to be seen as herself and not her gifts. Free to risk. Free to live. And as her story progresses, the bars of her cage only thicken, bringing a captivity far worse than any her well-meaning parents place on her.
~*~
I hope you’ve enjoyed meeting my headstrong princess as much as I’ve enjoyed presenting her to you! If you’ve done Beautiful People this month, let me know so I can come meet your characters too.
By the way, you know the goal I made to finish the first draft of this novella before the end of July? Well, I’m at about 14K words right now, which gives me less than two weeks to write the next 6. According to the chart I made (yes, I did that), I’m on track . . . but whether this story will actually be done within the word limit is questionable. It’s trying desperately to become a full-length novel. When the whole falling asleep thing occurs around the halfway mark, you know you have a problem. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have my editing knife to sharpen in preparation.