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Tag: The Brightest Thread

Beautiful People – Prince Hadrian

Tracey Dyck 30 Comments

Hello hello, daring questers! It occurs to me that I have not done a Beautiful People post in quite some time (ahem, since January). In light of that lack, and in light of the fact that:

a) I’ve been immersed in The Brightest Thread this week
and b) the questions this month couldn’t be more perfect for my male protagonist . . .

I’ve decided to properly introduce you to Hadrian, the precious, frustrated hero of The Brightest Thread!

[For more BP posts, read this one about the female protagonist, Luci, and this one about the villainess, Vyntyri. You can also check out this Dual Character Inquisition, featuring both Luci and Hadrian.]


Beautiful People is a (typically monthly) writing meme hosted by Cait @ Paper Fury (a.k.a ruler of all) and Sky @ Further Up and Further In (a.k.a master of fangirldom). Grab the ten questions, join in, and be sure to leave your link in the shiny little linkup gadget. It’s a great way to dig deeper into your characters and meet other writers!

Meet Hadrian, crown prince of Bauglind.


[via Pinterest]

1. What’s their favorite place they’ve ever visited?

Hadrian loves the outdoors. Put him in the royal garden or out in the jungle/wilderlands, and he’s the happiest you’ll ever find him. The specific location doesn’t matter, as long as something is growing underfoot.

2. What’s one mistake they made that they learned from?

the streets of Vale
[via Pinterest]
On an errand in the heart of Vale, the capital city of his kingdom, he comes across a merchant harassing a customer and trying to cheat money out of her. Hadrian, already stressed due to prior happenings in the story, is filled with righteous indignation and rather . . . forcibly puts a stop to the merchant’s behavior. Later, he discovers that instead of fixing the injustice, he only pushed the merchant into even worse actions.
A flurry of more pressing events hasn’t given Hadrian much time to process this, but eventually he’ll realize that one can’t force morality on another. (Much as he’d like to.) Taking away a merchant’s wares or writing a new law won’t restore his crumbling kingdom–reaching the people’s hearts will.

3. What was their favorite subject in school? Or favorite thing to learn about?

He’s quite the horticulturist. Cultivating, crossbreeding, all of it is of interest to him. His latest project is developing the gildleaf: a plant with roots that have medicinal properties. As far as schooling goes, his tutors were never the agreeable sort, but he has a natural inclination toward history.

4. What’s their favorite flower/growing thing?

All of them! In his words, “To discover the character of each is a joy. I hope to one day know the intricacies of them all.”

5. Have they ever made someone cry? What happened?

He has made Luci cry in a couple of the dreams they’ve shared (since her enchanted sleep enables her to enter other people’s dreams), but the reasons are . . . well, crossing into spoiler territory.

6. Would you consider them a reliable or unreliable narrator?

I would say he’s a pretty reliable narrator. Luci a bit less so, simply because of her rebellious side. But Hadrian’s a balanced person and a good judge of character. So except for situations when his strong moral compass might blot out the shades of gray in a situation, he’s a reliable narrator.

7. What do they dream about at night?

(Do you see how perfect this question is? Do you?! I am delighted.)
Ahem. Hadrian never remembered his dreams growing up, and good thing, too. If that wasn’t the case, having a half-ogress for a stepmother might have caused constant nightmares. (Though I wonder if perhaps he did have nightmares that he’s blocked from memory. Survival techniques, right?) But when Luci started haunting his sleep, he started remembering his dreams in the morning. They often feature strange versions of real places he’s been, like his palace halls, the seaside, or the jungle. And then there’s some that are completely arbitrary.

8. They’ve gone out for a “special meal.” What would they eat?

Hearty fare, that’s for sure. He likes flavor and new spices and has a particular fascination with fruits and vegetables (obviously) but enjoys wild boar and other protein. As long as it’s good food, he’s content.
[via Pinterest]

9. Do they have any distinguishing or unique talents?

His penchant for growing things has already been mentioned, so I won’t repeat myself.
Hadrian is also an above average swordsman, but he compares himself to Chief Rook, a master of swordplay and commander of Bauglind’s army, so Hadrian doesn’t think all that highly of his own skills.
He’s also great with people. His strong convictions might be off-putting to some, but aside from that, he’s very perceptive and–unless provoked–excels in diplomacy. (In contrast, Luci is terrible at being polite. If it weren’t for one of the fairies’ magical gifts, she would offend a lot more people. Having Hadrian around is good for her.)

10. What’s at least one thing they want to do before they die?

Uh, how much time do you have? Hadrian’s dreams are lofty and large.
Bauglind is rotting from the inside out (metaphorically speaking), so one of his greatest aspirations is to reverse the decay once he becomes king. He wants to reinstate truth and justice. He wants to raise the oppressed and rein back the oppressors. This is a task that will take a lifetime and more to complete, but he’s committed.
A more recent goal is to rescue Luci from her curse. She’s stolen his heart, much as she hates to admit it, and he will put aside all other dreams in order to reach her.
On a more lighthearted note, if Hadrian had a bucket list, it would surely include fun, adventurous things like voyaging across the sea, riding a dragon, going spelunking in some dark, forgotten cave, charting the stars, visiting other kingdoms, and turning as much of his palace into a garden as possible.

Hadrian is most likely pleased to meet you, unless you’re a duplicitous scoundrel, and he would love to give you a tour of his garden. Any questions for him, ask away in the comments! 🙂

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Subplots and Storylines – May 2017

Tracey Dyck 24 Comments

Transitions are fickle things. Sometimes one hardly realizes that the season of life has changed, and other times one is aware of every minute detail. May was a month of transition for me, slipping from college to “normal” life.

Princess Peach (me) and Mario (my brother)
It started out with exams, volunteering at a Special Olympics swimming event with my classmates, and dressing up as Princess Peach at a church event for moms and their little ones. There was a Mario Kart track set up where kids could drive little motorized cars in a circle, and my brother and I provided the entertainment!
(Ignore my awkward princess pose. And the fact that my crown is falling off.)

On another day, my classmates and the college interns had a barbecue to celebrate the end of the year. We had written letters to God at the beginning of the year, and now we got to open them and see just how far we’ve come since September.

Then it was Mother’s Day. In creative ministry (for college), we worked hard to put up some amazing décor to celebrate all the moms in church. It turned out beautifully. And at home, we had a quiet celebration involving Chinese takeout. (Come on, we saved her from making supper!)

And then I went to an escape room with my peeps from creative ministry! I’ve never been to an escape room before, but after this, I would LOVE to go again. I tried a castle-themed room with twelve other people. The logic! The teamwork! The tricky puzzles! If we’d had an extra two or three minutes, we would’ve made it out successfully, that’s how close we were.

The middle of the month rolled around, and with it, college graduation! Celebrating with friends and family, looking back on the past nine months, giving a valedictorian speech, and spending the night at a friend’s place for the afterparty–all were such beautiful, bittersweet memories.



We graduated! This is me with Jacky, a good college friend who
recently moved back home, hours away from me. *sniffle*

Like I said, May was a month of transitions. So after grad, life has switched gears. I’ve returned to volunteering in kids ministry at church (which I had taken a break from because of the intense college schedule). I’m back to working four or five shifts a week. And now that my sisters are done school for the summer, life at home has taken on a different pace too. You’d think it would be slower, but oddly, it’s not as slow as I was expecting.

Books

Finally // Wendy Mass

Goodness, I’d forgotten how dramatic the twelve-year-old life could be! This was a cute book about the mishaps and missteps that befall Rory when she turns twelve and can finally do all the things on her list, like get her ears pierced, babysit, and go to the mall with her friends. (Talk about a throwback to simpler days . . .) Four stars.

Crazy Dangerous audiobook // Andrew Klavan (narrated by Nick Podehl)

I read the novel four years ago and loved it then. Listening to the audiobook, I loved it again! It’s intense, it’s endearing, it’s a little creepy at times, and Sam Hopkins is just my favorite. I was reminded of how addictive Andrew Klavan’s books are! Because I can count the number of audiobooks I’ve listened to on one hand, I wasn’t sure what to expect with this. But the narrator was perfect for this book. Now I need to go find some more audiobooks to listen to on my drive to work. Five stars!

The Purpose Driven Life // Rick Warren

Another college read. We started in September, but we didn’t even finish (as a class) before grad, so I finished the final chapters on my own. I’m pretty sure I read it eons ago too . . . Anyway, there were a number of good reminders in here. It’s not like I got nothing out of it, don’t get me wrong. But I learned the most from the chapters I disagreed with, because they sparked great class discussions. We dug into the Word, bounced perspectives off each other, and learned how to rectify the disconnect between what we saw in the book vs. what we know of God’s character and the Bible. Three stars.

Green Rider // Kristen Britain

At Jacky’s behest, I began reading one of her favorite series! It felt like the pacing lagged at times, especially in the first half of the book, and later the climax kept looking it was going to happen, but then it wasn’t the climax after all. (That could’ve been just me, though.) But the actual ending helped make up for it, especially when Karigan, the protagonist, started doing more for herself. And I liked the concept of the Green Riders, a group of special messengers/riders with magical abilities. Jacky tells me the series gets progressively better, so I’ll pick up book two sometime. Three stars.

Movies & TV

I watched a fair bit of Once Upon a Time and The Flash, as per usual. My siblings and I finished season 1 of OUAT and started season 2. With my parents, I finished OUAT season 2. With just my sisters, we watched some more of season 5. Jumping around the timeline so much is kind of fun, actually. You get a really good contrast of different parts of each character’s arc!

My siblings and I just recently finished season 2 of The Flash as well. Somebody help me, I think the pieces of my heart are all over the floor. (Seriously, I need to write a blog post about this show ASAP.)

The grade 6 students of a nearby Christian school made a movie based on a WWII novel, which I got to watch. They did such a good job!

Moana: While not as good as Tangled, this was a fresh twist on the typical Disney princess story. I liked that it was a friendship story instead of a romance. And the songs were fantastic! I’ve loved “How Far I’ll Go” long before I watched the movie.

Doctor Strange: This was awesomesauce, you guys. Quite different than most Marvel movies, yes, but I think that’s a good thing. The beginning–wow. Something about the subtlety and atmosphere (and Stephen Strange’s awful attitude) really grabbed me. And then the superhero aspect kicks in . . . and there are jaw-dropping visuals . . . and a dash of humor . . . and gahhh, I want the Cloak of Levitation for myself. Can’t wait for a sequel!


Writing

I booked my appointments for Realm Makers! Woohoo! It feels even more real now, and the pressure is on to finish The Brightest Thread in time to pitch it.

With college being over, I had some time to pick up Ted Dekker’s The Creative Way writing course, so I listened to session 12 and learned more about the four types of conflict. (I’ve yet to do the workbook part of that session, however.)

In the first half of May, I had a little blip of productive writing time, and then wrote basically nothing until after grad. About 12,000 words have been added to The Brightest Thread, bringing it to a total of 32,824 words. The goal is to fall comfortably between 80 and 90k by the end of June so that there’s time to edit a bit before Realm Makers. S.O.S. Please send coffee.

I’ll be fine . . . probably. Most of this TBT work has been quite enjoyable, truly, and this week I wrote some positively scrumptious scenes, if I do say so myself.
But still send coffee. I’m going to need it.

So that was May 2017!

Whew! A lot of fun, some hard work. Goodbye to one season and hello to another. And now it’s summer, and that means sunshine, gardening, and hopefully more books and more writing.

What about the rest of you? If you’re a student, is school out yet? What’s on your summer agenda?

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When Your Story is Too Short: Tips for Expansion

Tracey Dyck 24 Comments

Do you remember when I first started writing The Brightest Thread back in 2015? The first draft was a somewhat flabby novella that I ended up shortening from almost 30,000 words to 20,000 words in order to follow the Five Magic Spindles contest guidelines.

Fast forward to 2017, and I’m taking that story I worked so hard to condense and expanding it into a full novel! Back when I was cutting words and soaking my keyboard in tears (slight exaggeration), I ached with the knowing that there was so much more story to explore, but no room to do it. I felt I could easily make it three times as long.

Well, now that I am actually trying to triple its size, it’s a lot harder than it looks! See, my stories have always had the bad habit of exploding on me. Subplots crop up, character arcs get deeper or more complicated, and connections start springing up like dandelions in May. (Seriously, I look out my window and there’s a sea of yellow.)

So things get . . . long. Short stories become novellas, novellas try to become novels, and standalones turn into series.  That’s just how I roll, I guess.

But I know lots of young writers have the exact opposite problem. Their stories are too short. By the time they type “The End” their supposed “epic YA fantasy novel” is only 50k, more like middle grade than YA. If that’s you, I can sympathize with you for the first time!

photo via Pinterest // graphic mine

So today we’re going to be looking at ways you can lengthen your stories–and not just padding them with fluff, but adding meaningful length.

And we’ll do it by re-examining the condensing tips I shared in Unraveling a Mess of Threads to see if any of them can be reverse-engineered. Perhaps the opposite principles will be helpful.

(And there will be random gifs, because why not?)

1. Streamline.

Nope, you don’t want to reverse this one! Every scene still needs to carry its weight. Don’t wander for the sake of extra words. That’s when the reader starts yawning–or worse, decides to put the book down.

2. Cut dialogue.

Brevity is still the soul of wit, even if you’re looking to expand a story, but you don’t have to be quite so ruthless with your dialogue now. A lot can be revealed in a conversation: personality, motives, conflicts, plot, etc. Characters are crucial to any story, and quite often, so are their interactions. So when they start talking to each other, don’t be afraid to dig a little deeper, and look for ways to add tension or conflict.

It doesn’t always have to be conflict between the characters, either. A tense conversation can be about the imminent war or the urgent need for supplies . . . or it can just as easily be about smaller conflicts, like the fact their local diner stopped selling chocolate milkshakes and they’re both upset about it.

The point is, add dialogue that does something. Treat conversations like mini stories: figure out what each person wants and what stands in their way.

3. Cut descriptions.

Now you’ll want to add description! But no purple prose, please–your reader proooobably doesn’t want to spend three pages watching a sunset unfold. Nor do they need to spend an agonizing amount of time listening to your protagonist navel-gazing.

However, if your story is running too short, there are probably lots of places you can beef up your descriptions. Use them to ground each scene. Intersperse them with action and movement. Engage all five senses. Strive to immerse your reader wholly within the world you’ve created! That world may never come out on the page 100% the way you imagine it in your mind, but get as close as possible.

If you’re struggling to find a place to add description in a scene, stop and consider what’s out of the ordinary about where that scene takes place. Yes, it might be in your protagonist’s average little kitchen and not in some wildly exotic fantasy locale, but try to find something relevant and interesting about your setting. Maybe the dishes have piled higher than normal because the character’s mom has been sick, and the plates are crusted in yesterday’s lasagna. Maybe the little brother left a note on the fridge saying he left to search for his missing puppy, but the brother is only six years old and your protagonist starts freaking out about him wandering the streets alone.

But do take note: we don’t need to know about the plates or the note if they don’t a) further the plot, or b) develop the characters. Yes, you want to add words, but you want to add words that matter!

4. Make a list of scenes.

In the original post, I suggested doing this for the purpose of getting a birds-eye view of your story. That way, it’s easier to spot which scenes aren’t pulling their weight and need to be cut out. But this is also a great strategy for finding places to expand! Did the story jump from the hero departing home to his arrival at a tavern on the way to his goal? Well, perhaps the journey in between can offer some conflict. Take that boring walk you skipped over and throw some obstacles at him. Ogres attack! The bridge is broken! Bandits steal his food! He stops to help a wounded peasant who will later betray him to the villain! He injures himself climbing a precipitous road! The sky’s the limit, folks. It may take extra work later on when editing to make sure your new scenes fit into the story’s flow, but it can be done.

5. Cut minor characters.

When every single word is measured, you keep your cast to the bare minimum. But when you’re expanding, adding a few more minor characters can provide more conflict, more dialogue, more revealing of main characters, and more subplots–in essence, more words. Who could you add to your story to further complicate events? This leads into the next tip . . .

6. Cut subplots.

This goes further than just adding scenes and characters. This means tying those extra things into your existing storyline, which can be easier said than done. Right now, with every new element I introduce to The Brightest Thread, I’m worried that it will draw the focus away from the main storyline, or that I’m making the story worse, not better. (But at this point I should be in creative mode, and save those sorts of judgments for editing.)

But a new subplot can enrich your story like nothing else. At some point, you’ll want to consider whether the subplot revolves around your story’s central plot and theme (it should), but for now, take some time to jot a list of all the crazy, difficult, dangerous, beautiful, or interesting things that could happen within your story.

This is where it becomes all about connections! This is when you get to decide that your villain is actually related to your hero, or that trade between two kingdoms is suffering, or that the regular old sword the sidekick wields is no longer an ordinary blade, but a magical object that somebody out there would do anything to obtain.

Rather than bog the story down, a well-written subplot will add depth and complexity.

7. Enter each scene late and leave it early.

KEEP DOING THIS. Basically, start each scene when the important stuff happens, and end it before the tension drops. Don’t waste time in getting things going or wrapping them up. This will keep those pages turning fast!

8. Cut unnecessary words.

Admit it, you have a collection of pet words that somehow manage to pepper every other page, no matter how much pet-word-repellant you spray your keyboard with. When you edit, please don’t leave those pesky things there just to keep your wordcount higher. Keep deleting whatever’s unnecessary. Pacing can be an issue on the scene level and on the sentence level.

Keeping that in mind, you can continue adding dialogue, descriptions, scenes, characters, and subplots. Just make them necessary. Tie them to the stakes of the story. Therein lies the key to meaningful additions.

To sum up:

When expanding a story, look for opportunities to:

  • Add dialogue
  • Add description
  • Add scenes
  • Expand the cast of characters
  • Create subplots

But don’t forget to:

  • Keep it streamlined
  • And make sure every addition either furthers the plot, develops a character, or both

And that’s all I’ve got! I’m excited about a certain (ahem, creepy) subplot I’m in the process of writing into TBT . . . it’s definitely going to change the flavor of the book somewhat, but I hope it will be in a good way.

Discussion time! Have you ever tried to lengthen a story? What worked for you? What didn’t work? Or if you’re planning to expand a story in the future, which of these tips do you think will help you the most?

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First Lines (Part 2)

Tracey Dyck 20 Comments

Back in January, I posted a collection of opening lines from various stories (in various stages of completion), but didn’t have room to include them all. So we’re back for round two!*


*Sorry, no graphics today. I barely had time to get the post itself ready, and it was already mostly prepared. XD

Legend tells of a great treasure deep in the heart of the Fortress of Eternal Winter, a treasure so valuable that the one worthy enough to find it should experience ecstasy beyond belief. And not only that, but they should find themselves with a life longer than any other. It was this prize the noble knight sought, and already it had cost him dearly . . .

[The Fortress of Eternal Winter, short story (a parody), complete]

***

The little girl shuffled through the dew-spangled grass, blinking sleep from her eyes. Just ahead, a man sat on a rock at the edge of the overhang.

He swivelled and gave her a soft smile. “Good morning, little one.”

She smiled back, though muzzily from morning drowsiness. “Morning.” She reached his side.

The man picked her up and set her on his lap. The two sat quietly for a time. Nothing was said, for the dawn spoke eloquently enough for them both. A burning red sliver of sun had already appeared along the horizon, and birds were testing their singing voices, and far, far away, the ocean surf sighed.

[This is the Day, flash fiction, complete]

***

“Merry Christmas, Hannah.” Lisa Kehler leaned down so the elderly, bedridden woman could hear her and gently squeezed the fragile hand.

[Tired of Doing Good, short story, complete]

***

Vannon paused, ice-encrusted shovel poised above a snowy drift. The air tingled with a barely perceptible whine, just at the edge of the ear’s range. He cocked his head and concentrated on the sound. His breath-clouds came slower; the dull roar of rushing blood slowed. At a glance, one would think him a statue: furry mantle frozen in thick tufts, short beard spangled with chilled drops of moisture, and rabbit-hide gloves wrapped tightly around his shovel’s wooden shaft.

There–there it was again. A faint drone, like the blur of insect wings. Vannon’s eyes slid to the southward mountains, a shattered spine of rock wracking the azure sky.

[untitled, unfinished]

***

I have one green eye and one brown eye. The green eye sees truth, but the brown eye sees much, much more. With it, I can perceive things no one else can. You make think this is a wonderful gift, but I assure you, it is a curse.

[untitled, writing exercise]

***

“Arctic, I already told you there was to be no snowfall practice in your room!” The voice, although muffled, demanded immediate attention.

Arctic winced and cracked her door open. A rivulet of water trickled past her foot and toward the stairs. “Sorry, mother.”

[untitled, writing exercise]

***

Pheori’s bare feet padded softly down the marble floor of the Emperor’s treasure hall. He rolled his eyes toward the vaulted ceiling and tried to pay attention to Emperor Cho’s happy prattling. But his legs ached to run somewhere and his lungs desired the hot desert oxygen.

[untitled, unfinished]

***

The glare of the August sun threw glints across the lake. Madison Paratore shielded her eyes with a hand. A sigh warmed her lips. “It’s the last hoorah, you guys.”

[untitled, unfinished]

***

“So Kendrick, are you going to fix it or what?”

“It doesn’t need fixing, Trapper.”

“Doesn’t need . . .? Kendrick! Look at it! It’s torn in the corners, covered in debris, and so bright a Flat-Raider could see it miles away.”

[untitled, writing exercise]

***

I slouch on the barstool and loop my fingers through the lacy yarn. It’s red and orange and burgundy, like the trees I see through the kitchen window.

“Are your parents coming back this evening?” Aunt Bailey asks. Her knitting needles click against each other and the half-made scarf drapes over her lap like a fluffy python.

[untitled, writing exercise]

***

Lyric reached the top of the stone steps built into the side of the hill. His tired legs were not nearly as heavy as his heart. Sharp wind slapped his face, tugged his long hair, pressed his cloak against his ribcage. “Talon,” he said, but a gust of air snatched away the name. He tried again, louder this time. “Talon?”

[untitled, writing exercise]

***

All was silent at the train station. A crumpled piece of trash blew past three pairs of feet at a bench–a pair of thick-soled black boots, two mismatched loafers, and red sneakers. One of these sneakers jiggled up and down very fast.

The owner of the red sneakers, Owen, sighed and looked at his watch. 5:13. The train was late.

[untitled, writing exercise]

***

I sit up with a start, blinking in the light shining over my desk. Had I fallen asleep? I rub my eyes and look around my bedroom. Everything looks the same as it always has. The clock shows 1:47 p.m. in glaring red letters.

[Rewritten, flash fiction, complete]

***

“Let’s go over this again.” Dr. Teagan propped his elbows on the desk and leaned forward. “I know we’ve discussed your experiences several times, but it would help with my diagnosis if we took another look at things. Is that all right with you?”
Josiah took a deep breath to quell the familiar heat churning in his belly. You’ve practically diagnosed me already. Why rehash it? But aloud he muttered, “Fine.”

[The Prophet’s Key, novel, unfinished]

***

The little flame throbbed, illuminating
Father’s hands as they worked. The glass rod he held with a metal tool drooped
over like a strand of freshly made taffy. He began fashioning one end. His
tweezers flashed in the firelight, slowly persuading the glass to take the form
he desired.

I watched over his
shoulder and held my breath. Magic required silence.


[The Glass Girl, novella, complete]

***



Tree branches scraped the sides of Emi’s car and leaves tinged in early-autumn gold fluttered at her windows. One hand on the wheel and the other fumbling with a roadmap, she squinted at the dirt lane, then back at the squiggly map lines.


“Way to go, Emi.” She blew air through her lips. “Lost.” Abandoning the incomprehensible map, she focused on the tire tracks ahead. On either side, the trees pressed in close and cast a network of evening shadows over her ’95 Dodge Spirit.


[Blood Rose, novella, complete]

***

Not
in centuries had the mountains rung with such gladness.


Aleida tilted her face toward the sun and smiled. The road winding
uphill was choked with people, nobles and countryfolk alike all traveling to
the castle for the celebration. Their lively chatter echoed against the crags.
[The Brightest Thread, novella-turning-into-a-novel, my current WIP, unfinished]

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