Folks, I have lost all trust in humanity. After housing the sixty-five nominated imps at my place for the past week, I can’t open doors without being jump-scared… can’t eat a sandwich without something suspect being slipped between my salami… and can’t get a wink of sleep for fear of being jolted out of bed by some horrific crash upstairs.
It certainly doesn’t help that Josiah’s nearly three dozen henchmen were ALSO sharing our quarters. They no doubt influenced the imps towards more dastardly deeds than usual.
And Pippin? Well, that hobbit has been no help at all. He spent the week in absolute stitches, laughing at my expense, and is actually at the walk-in clinic as we speak, complaining of a very sore stomach. That’s what you get, you fool of a Took.
Now, my co-hosts have tried to be helpful. Christine did offer to send dragons to help wrangle the imps into order, but I declined, saying it might be best to keep all open flames well away from the likes of my company. Kenzie also offered to send a few wise counselors over, but none of them showed up. I think they got distracted by a philosophical discussion about the merits of courage and forgot all about my troubles.
But no worries. After five years of hosting under my belt, I knew what I was signing up for.
I just hope my Silmaril Awards Host Insurance will cover the busted front door, the damage done to my living room couches by glittering pink slime, and the gaping hole blown into my backyard…
Now then! I’d better introduce the nasty delightful imps who rose to the top of the heap, so that you know who to vote for. Without further ado, I present… THIS YEAR’S TOP FIVE MISCHIEVOUS IMPS!
Peeves
Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling
As a resident poltergeist at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Peeves has been a constant pain to the school and its inhabitants for centuries. He takes a particular joy in harassing Filch, the caretaker. Nigh impossible to control, Peeves amuses himself by throwing water balloons at students, throwing sticks at the prefect, dumping tarantulas in the Great Hall, bouncing around the trophy room, and generally giving ghosts a bad name. However, he has been known to slyly help out students like Fred and George Weasley in creating chaos.
“Oh, most think he’s barking, the Potty wee lad,
But some are more kindly and think he’s just sad,
But Peevesy knows better and says that he’s mad—“
Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone
Sage
The Ascendance series by Jennifer Nielsen
A defiant orphan boy, Sage believes he has what it takes to impersonate the kingdom’s long-lost prince and take the throne. He’s wickedly clever, resourceful, and willing to dance on a knife’s edge to get what he wants. He can slither out of the stickiest situations—be it the treachery of court or the violence of pirates—with his lightning-quick wit, buckets of sass, and death-defying stunts. Always full of surprises, Sage is a layered character with an unpredictable depth of heart beneath all his trickery.
In a crowd of a thousand boys claiming to be the prince, there would be only one with the same look of trouble in his eye.
The False Prince
Pet
The City Between series by W.R. Gingell
Pet is a relatively normal human from Hobart, Australia who happens to be the companion (or, well, Pet) to a trio of two fae and a vampire… but the fact that she is, as some would say, just a human doesn’t stop her from inserting herself into fae business (usually in defense of the humans who got caught up in it), making snarky comments, or using every trick she can come up with to annoy the vampire (and the more imperious fae she encounters). And she has more tricks up her sleeve than you’d think, thanks not just to her cleverness but also to some mysterious and unexpected abilities. While she knows when enough’s enough (usually), if you happen to make yourself her target . . . beware.
So I spent the morning profitably instead. And when I say profitably, I mean that I went around the entire house and made every picture on the walls just a little higher on the right. Not much. Not even so much as an obsessive-compulsive human would notice. Maybe a millimetre.
After that, I went quietly around the house and took off one curtain ring from every set of curtains to make a single section sag slightly on each one. That didn’t seem like quite enough, but I didn’t want to risk JinYeong coming home and catching me at it, so the only other thing I did was pinch Athelas’ cologne and put the tiniest drop of it in the carpet of JinYeong’s wardrobe.
With any luck, it would drive him crazy, the suspicion of someone else’s scent on his clothes.
It’s the little things in life, man.
Between Shifts
Cheshire Cat
Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
The first thing you’ll notice about the Cheshire Cat is his wide, mischievous grin—but that might be the only thing you see of him, as he’s known to disappear before one’s eyes, leaving his smile for last. As the cat of the Duchess and one of the most iconic characters in Wonderland, Cheshire offers Alice his own signature blend of mystifying advice and perplexing remarks… and is really no good at giving directions.
Alice asked the Cheshire Cat, who was sitting in a tree, “What road do I take?”
The cat asked, “Where do you want to go?”
“I don’t know,” Alice answered.
“Then,” said the cat, “it really doesn’t matter, does it?”
Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland
Tinker Bell
Peter Pan by J.M. Barrie
Born of a baby’s laugh, Tinker Bell hails from the island of Neverland and is Peter Pan’s hot-tempered companion. She is a tinker, as her name suggests, and her voice sounds like the tinkling of bells to all those who don’t speak the fairy language. Being so tiny, she has room for only one emotion at a time—which leads her to swing between extremes at a moment’s notice. She is fiercely loyal to Peter and, in her jealousy, frequently directs anger and spite toward Wendy… such as the time she convinced the Lost Boys to shoot the Darling girl from the sky.
“I remember,” said Slightly instantly, “there are birds called Wendies.”
“See, it comes,” cried Curly, pointing to Wendy in the heavens.
Wendy was now almost overhead, and they could hear her plaintive cry. But more distinct came the shrill voice of Tinker Bell. The jealous fairy had now cast off all disguise of friendship, and was darting at her victim from every direction, pinching savagely each time she touched.
Peter Pan
Who do YOU say is the most impish imp among these five? Choose wisely! And before you cast your votes below, be sure to make the rounds to the other blogs, so as to familiarize yourself with the other contestants. (Who knows what shenanigans you’ll hear about from the hosts!)
- Strangest Character // DJ Edwardson
- Wisest Counselor // Kenzie Keene
- Most Epic Hero // Madeline J. Rose
- Least Competent Henchman // Josiah Dyck
- Most Majestic Ruler // Sarah Pennington
- Most Faithful Friend // Grace T
- Most Mischievous Imp // Tracey Dyck (You are here!)
- Most Magnificent Dragon // Christine Smith
- Most Epic Heroine // E.E. Rawls
- Most Nefarious Villain // Jem Jones
- Most Silver Tongue // Jenelle Schmidt
VISIT SILMARILAWARDS.COM TO CAST YOUR VOTES!
Now tell me, which imp are you rooting for this year? A poltergeist, would-be prince, snarky Australian, disappearing cat, or feisty fairy?
P.S. Be sure to head to Jenelle’s blog first thing next Monday morning (September 20th), as she’s kicking off the first awards ceremony!
Pingback:Voting for the Least Competent Henchman /// The Silmaril Awards 2021 – Josiah Dyck – Author
Pingback:2021 Silmaril Awards Voting - djedwardson.com
Pingback:The Silmaril Awards 2021 Voting: Most Magnificent Dragon – Christine Smith
Pingback:2021 Silmaril Awards Voting: Most Majestic Ruler! | Light and Shadows
Pingback:2021 Silmaril Awards // Voting Round! | Short & Snappy
*laughing* Poor Tracey, stuck with all these pranksters, AND Josiah’s henchmen! XD And what great imps as finalists! Love all these descriptions of them! 😀
I WILL SURVIVE. SOMEHOW. XD Haha, thank ya, Deb! 😀
Ohoho!! There are so many good ones in this category this year!!! I lowkey MIGHT have shrieked a little bit when I saw the Cheshire cat make an appearance. XD
ALSO. This post was GOLDEN. XD I must say it seems like quite the handful to house all of these imps under one roof (not to mention having all of the henchman with them!), so I’m quite proud of how well you’ve handled things! And 5 Silmaril Awards!!! Dude! That is INCREDIBLE! (also this clearly means you are one of the wisest members and therefore perfectly matched with keeping all of these mischievous critters in line. XD)
Huzzah for Wonderland rep! 😀 I’m soooo torn between all these amazing characters, though.
Why thank you, Kenzie! Coming from the queen of humor herself, I’m glad you enjoyed it! Ah yes, you pick up a few tricks as a host the longer you do it… For instance, it’s CRUCIAL to stock your pantries in advance. Seems like heroes and villains and imps alike are all crazy hungry. o.O (And psshhh, I don’t know about one of the wisest members, but thanks for your vote of confidence! XD)
Goodness me, 66 imps IN ADDITION to Josiah’s henchmen. It is truly a mercy you guys still have your sanity! The glittery pink slime tho. XD We definitely need to look into better insurance plans for these awards…
Oh man, THE CHOICES THIS YEAR. Peeves? Cheshire? Tinker Bell??? How is a girl to chose?! TOO MANY GOOD CHOICES.
It’s WILD over here, lemme just say. o.o We’ll see if our sanity remains intact until the end of the awards, heh. And 100% agree about that insurance. XD
RIGHT? I was thinking this would be one of the easiest categories for me to choose, but haha NOPE.
Oh my goodness. That’s a lot of chaos for one house. At least most of it will be going away after today!
This is one of the few categories where I actually have no hesitation over who I’m voting for — one character I love, three I’m ambivalent about, and one I’ve only ever met in Silmaril Award posts? That’s a blessedly easy choice. xD
Oh, I think those 60+ imps are planning to stick around to see the rest of the festivities. Wish me luck… XD
I suspect I know which one you love and which one you’ve only met in the awards! I’m still puzzling over who I’ll vote for, ahhhh! So many choices…
asdfghjkl I always end up feeling sorry for whoever’s hosting the Mischievous Imps award! You did well, Tracey, you did well. What an assortment of finalists we’ve got this year!!
Haha! It had to me eventually. XD Thanks, Merie–now to make it to the end of the awards without too much damage (to my house OR my sanity)!
AWK!! This is an AMAZING list of finalists!! (I definitely know who I’m voting for, though…that snippet from Between Shifts had me laughing SO HARD the first time I read it. And every time I’ve read it since. XD)
Isn’t it? I’m having a hard time narrowing it down for my vote! (Ha, love it! I can’t wait to meet Pet and JinYoung and the rest for myself soon!)
I think we need to consider the consequences of teaming up for the Silmaril Awards next year and plan accordingly. Like, imagine if we’d had both villains and dragons in our home. Or silver tongues and imps. *shudders*
As soon as I saw one particular, I knew exactly who I was voting for. That’s pretty much been the case for all the categories. It’s too bad that there aren’t more characters that I really know and love getting into the final round.
Definitely need to coordinate better next time! There could be disastrous consequences otherwise… o.o
Ahhh, but it’s good motivation to add more books to your TBR! 😉
Pingback:2021 Silmaril Awards voting is open - Silmaril Awards
Loved this post with all the clever quips and pranks and general frivolity. Can’t wait for the insanity that will be the award presentation!
Wow, I actually know 3 out of the 5 on this list and I could see myself voting for any of them. We’ll know soon which one is the most Impish in 2021!
Thanks so much, DJ! And apologies for my belated reply.
I’m curious which one you ended up voting for! It’s definitely harder when you know most of the characters.